You Better Watch Your Elf

Audiophiles, Listen Here: Gerard opened the flimsy envelope as soon as he got back to his desk, like everyone at Numo Corp. Inside, he found a glittery, unsigned “Happy Holidays” card and a gift card for $25 at the grocery store. Fourteen years at this place, chasing pennies on doll production costs until his eyes… Continue reading You Better Watch Your Elf

******* Show

Audiophiles, Listen Here: “Can’t I just give you my name?” “No, sir, I am not legally allowed to ask for your name. Please provide your LifeSecure User ID.” The girl with the short black hair behind the counter couldn’t have been over 20 years old, and Paul guessed she probably didn’t remember anything before LifeSecure,… Continue reading ******* Show

SWIT!

Audiophiles, Listen Here: “Alan? Are you listening to me or shall I hit you over the head with that ladle? Put down your banana and look at this!” Loretta demanded. Alan didn’t answer. Alan was up to his elbows in banana bread batter when the zombies converged. When Alan did look up to see what… Continue reading SWIT!

The Going Rate

Reading by Ear: “What’s the matter with you today, somebody leave a turd under your pillow or something?” Fay plopped the bag of teeth on the counter and started boiling water to clean them. Mike was sitting at the kitchen table, looking sourly at the bowl of Grape-Nuts in front of him. “I just don’t… Continue reading The Going Rate

Feast of All Souls

Audiophiles, Listen Here: “Gimme a large caramel iced mocha with seven pumps of syrup and extra whip.” The man was a few feet away at the counter, but his large body crowded the space. “Throw in two of those scones, too, the blueberry ones.” His face was puffy where it wasn’t covered in hair, everything… Continue reading Feast of All Souls

Cold Snap, An Unexpected Break as Told to Alexa by Cayden, Age 6 3/4

To hear the actual audio, click here: Monday, 5:30AM: Hi, Alexa! I have to talk to you, because Momma says it’s too early and Junie won’t talk to me after I looked for the candy in her Skullcandy headphones. I’m up so early because the school called and Momma’s phone is set real loud. We… Continue reading Cold Snap, An Unexpected Break as Told to Alexa by Cayden, Age 6 3/4

Glitter and BOOM

Audiophiles, Listen Here: The target’s name was Sheila Hamspelter, codename “SHELIA.” We let Brian come up with the codename, and you get what you get with Brian. My plan for infiltration was simple. We would ride in on flowers and disperse from there, achieving maximum coverage over several days. Brian fell on his flat face… Continue reading Glitter and BOOM